Why is it so cold here? Someone make it stop!!! It’s pretty rare that I notice the cold. I’m a normal Midwesterner- We discuss the weather (incessantly) but we don’t complain about it. How much you can stand before you break down and admit to being cold is a matter of pride, and I will never give in, especially not around all the whiners in NYC. Buck up, kiddos! When it’s -32, your complaints will start to be legitimate. When it’s 32 degrees above zero, you are just a whiner.
But I admit. I’m giving in. I’m cold! I need to go to the grocery store, but I’ll be damned if I’m going to walk 4 blocks in the cold today. I’ll just eat that lonely Lean Cuisine that’s been languishing in the back of the freezer and hope that tomorrow the temperature is higher. I really should have gone to the bank today, but oh hell no. That check can wait until my ears aren’t pink from the cold, despite my awesome hat. Instead, I will curl up on my couch with a glass of red wine to stay warm (some people might suggest hot cocoa or coffee, but they clearly have never experienced the warming powers of a bottle of Montepulciano, poor souls.) I will watch Gossip Girl reruns and 30 Rock DVDs and let my idol Blair Waldorf and true alter ego Liz Lemon enjoy a chilly NYC (after all, they look so much cuter in it that I do!) while I remain in my toasty warm apartment (not that my apartment is all that warm, but it is once I am cocooned in 8 layers of fleece, flannel, and down!)
I’m starting to think the prairie dog has the right idea after all. Wake me up when spring returns, okay?
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